Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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