the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
