butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
