Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
