Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize