There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize