They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
