I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
