I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
