I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Randomize
