I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
