a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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