i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
