Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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