i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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