Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
