he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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