By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
