One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
