turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
