Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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