everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
