Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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