Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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