they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
