I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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