what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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