do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
