YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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