You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I wish i was in the wii world.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
