similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
pop tarts are not kleenex
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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