You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
So many bounce houses so little time
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
