I just saw a hot homeless man
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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