Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
