yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
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