we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
