Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
COCAINE IS GR8
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
