That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
