i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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