I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
