i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
