needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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