Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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