girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize