This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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