How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize