You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
