After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
True but thats because hes a fetus.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
