we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
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