I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Randomize
