Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
